Without a doubt, relationships provide the greatest opportunity for healing and personal growth, when partners are willing to meet each other with compassion, honesty and unbounded intimacy.
Over the course of a relationship many couples (and triads) will naturally hit periods of challenge and contention. These conflicts originate from many sources, including: our culture’s lack of healthy-relationship models, poor communication, attachment issues, gender inequality, ego-protection, and histories of psychological and/or sexual trauma, just to name a few.
When intimacy fails on top of this, individuals are left feeling hurt, misunderstood, isolated and frustrated by a situation that once appeared to be love.
Most of our deepest wounds result from being hurt by another, so until we can liberate ourselves from the influence of those injuries (which typically manifest as coping strategies that block intimacy), they will continue to negatively impact our romantic connections.
Relationships can offer us a level of healing that we cannot manage alone, but in order for that to happen, both (or all) partners must be willing to self-reflect, accept total responsibility for their words and actions, and practice emotional regulation and compassionate speech.
Couples counseling can be tremendously helpful in supporting the evolution of romantic partnership(s). In session, we uncover the relational dynamics that are creating discord, reestablish goals, learn effective modes of communication, and practice techniques to regulate emotions and eradicate the escalation that can otherwise lead to lasting damage.
Sentient beings are intended to live happily in connection to others, and to enjoy the reflection and intimacy that we all innately seek; relationship work is an often necessary application for removing the obstacles to getting there.